Apartment Update...so much as it is.

Well, I'm still digesting the TOOL concert. It was great fun, but I was disappointed about the end. More on that later, with some more pics I took during the show.

Here are some new pics of my apartment. I did some cleaning and rearranging this weekend and today (I called in sick to work today, as I was not feeling well in my tummy). Now my apartment is cleaner and more organized, but it looks totally empty.







You might ask, where's all the furniture? Well, I'm working on that. I planned on starting over with my furniture when I moved back down, I just thought I'd have a better job before now to afford furnishing an apartment. Its not bad, and I'm comfortable by myself, but if I have company I just have to hope they understand my situation...lol.

I hope to have a real bed/futon soon, and maybe some sort of chair or other sitting apparatus, but as for now, its a work in process and I'm ok with that.

One of the funnier things that I realized when I unpacked (I unpacked 2 boxes of clothes and one suitcase more of clothes, keeping in mind that I took several bags of clothes to Goodwill) my clothes and hats....I have a RIDICULOUS amount of hats. I made a hat rack out of plastic garden lattice a few years back, but it 'only' holds 28 hats. I have this 'little' box of hats, but when I unpacked it, I had FAR to many to fit on the rack. I haven't even been able to sort out the 28 hats I want to put on the rack yet, or how to put the other hats out to see. CRAZY right? I just thought it was funny.

Anyhow, hopefully I'll have something to write about with regards to the TOOL concert soon.

G~

damn..finally the real sound check!

its almost TOOL time!

apparently a bit early to the show...

do they really think those chairs are going to stay in place?

heading in to the concert!

getting down to the Boss IPA at LW!

Got my TOOL face on!

Todd and I are headed up to P-Town!

How about an update??

So I finally went down to the public library yesterday. I was pretty excited getting back in there, it was funny how it seemed that a whole new world of information had opened up to me. Well, it had...lol. I had been meaning to get down to the library (I live 5 blocks or so from it) and just kept putting it off, but I had been compiling a list of subjects for me to look up.

I got into the library and its just so frikken huge! I was a bit lost, but luckily I found a librarian to help me out. I actually applied for a job with the library this last August, but didn't get it. I worked in the library in high school for several semesters and really enjoyed it. I think I would like this one too, but maybe another time.

Here is my list of subjects that I compiled so far:

Energy Management
Craft Brewing - History and how to
Learn Spanish
Learn Sign Language
Advertising/Marketing
Manufacturing related

I checked out 5 books while I was there, 4 were related to energy management (I'm researching how to conserve energy on a residential basis, I've already done quite a bit of reading online), and the 5th was related to craft brewing.

I also bookmarked online about 30 other books to have a look at sometime later. The online access for the library is pretty fantastic. I'm really looking forward to some more exploration at the library.

Work has been work, but I did finally get to put some meat to documenting processes and principles today. I spent about an hour and a half writing out some things I have learned since I started, and some things I had discussed with 'the boss'. I'm hoping we can work some more on it, and I'd really like to fully document most of their big processes. Its hard to believe that, as a manufacturing business, they have no documentation of their procedures, its all word of mouth. I'd actually like to make that my job there, along with training, I guess we'll see how that goes.

On the subject of jobs, I've had a couple of calls from a recruiter offering a job at a software company in the Eugene area. I'm not sure if I want that type of job again, but I think discussing the options isn't a bad thing. I did also find a 10 hour a week job posted on Craigslist, its with a nonprofit called Oregon Wild. Basically it sounds like they are involved with alot of legislation (and litigation) to preserve Oregon's forests. The job starts at 10 hours and could work into full time. That sounds alot like a job I would be interested in, and I do think I'll apply for it.

I also decided to get more exercise, and guess how (this will really kick your ass). I have a goal for this summer, and its running the Butte to Butte in under an hour. My first year I ran it in 56 minutes, which was good, but in the next few years I got slower and slower. This last year, I was in such poor shape (about 25lbs overweight, and feeling super tubby) and felt so bad while running (running=walking most of it, and jogging some) that I vowed immediately afterwards to bring my time under an hour.

So I want to bike ride more, and thats great. I'll also continue playing basketball with regularity, but what I really want to do is this: I want to do a 'run/jog' from my place to 'the hill' and back. Sounds tough, but I think I'm driven enough to give it a try. I'll keep my blog posted on how that goes (maybe I'll get to mobile blog some of my route and the places I pass along the way, that'd be great!).

Have I mentioned that I'm glad to be back in Eugene? I'm so happy! Now I just need to furnish my apartment and make it a little more mine, like home. YAY!

Oh yeah...I got paid yesterday. Whoopee! Of course its all gone! Damn.

Well. I'll report back in soon with some mobile blogging from Portland and the Tool show!

Its TOOL time!!!

Yep, its true. I'm going to see TOOL in concert tomorrow with Todd and a couple other friends! I saw them the last time they were here at the Hult Center, with fantastic seats (3rd row center stage). These seats aren't as good, but I don't care at all. We have to drive to Portland too, and I also don't care about that!

Tool is my favorite band (well, I love Rage Against the Machine as well, and they just reunited, so I'll go nuts if they tour within 5 or 6 hundred miles of me) and I'm totally stoked that I get to go see them again. I do consider myself extremely lucky to be able to see them. Not everyone gets to see their favorite band live and in person. WOOH!

I'll let you know how it goes!

Speaking of parallel universes.

Have you ever thought about parallel universes? I have one of those irrational fears that I'm sure everyone has. Everyone has that fear right? Just like the fear of heights I have.

Just think of everything that would be explained by the parallel universe:

You know that car that wasn't in the lane next to you before you went to switch?
How about ghosts? I don't believe in ghosts, but I bet if you thought you saw a ghost, it could be a person in a parallel universe, just right on the edge of both.
Ever see something out of the corner of your eye, then you turn and its gone?
Here's one for you, how about people with multiple personality disorders (wait, who said that?)? Crazy people, the voices they hear, couldn't they be someone on the edge of both?
Back to the personality disorders, what if each person is actually be from alternate or parallel universe just jumping around from one to another?

For a while now, I've had this really unreasonable fear that parallel universes will collide, at the wrong time. Mostly I think about it when I'm going through an intersection...imagine the calamity, the confusion if identical, parallel universes collided then. I'd be sitting there freaking out like a crazy person, saying that the light was green for me when it was clearly red with cars going through it. Of course the universes would immediately have gone back to their rightful places...

Ok, I don't really think about it all the time, but it does occur to me that it could happen..What a weirdo!
some science fiction books I read when I was in high school

If I were posting a personal ad...

Hello there!

I would describe myself as quirky, but not in a creepy/weird way. I tend to think of myself as pretty normal.

I like to do things outdoors and in, just depends on mood or weather. I like movies, but I prefer to be more social. I like to play most sports, I was recently in an outdoor volleyball league (as a first timer), played softball for the last two and a half summers, and am an avid basketball player (both league and pick-up ball). I like to run road races when I get a chance (I do the Butte to Butte here in Eugene every summer) , and will generally do anything I'm invited to do. I love to hike, and made several hikes of varying difficulty this last summer.

I'm not super big on video games, but I do have occasion to play (I get a real kick out of Guitar Hero and Rock Band). Not a car guy, but I do appreciate certain aspects of cars, sleek subtle
lines, power, performance, etc. I love to see car things live (I've volunteered at a couple of 'rally' style car races in the last 3 years).

I'm from the northwest, so I do fancy a good craft brew, and have been labeled as a snob. I've grown past the years of consuming just to consume (that is not to say that a night of tasting doesn't get extended...lol). I really like the complexity of the things I consume: chocolate, beer, coffee, sushi, wine...the list goes on.

I'm think I'm average looking (in a good way), as my attached picture should attest to. The stats? Before I forget, I'll drop that in. I'm 32, 6'1", 200lbs and have an average build. This is the most recent pic I could find that I like. It was taken this August in SFO, I was at a Giants game with my best bud.




I've been hesitant to date recently, and one reason is that I fear I'll be viewed as having no aspirations or maybe even motivation. In the last few months basically I turned my life upside-down. I quit a respectable job (pay-wise) I had in Beaverton and moved back here to
Eugene (Eugene being my hometown for the previous 23 years). Now I'm working a job that doesn't really look like much at this point. In Beaverton I was working far too much, not taking good care of myself, and not seeing my family enough. I decided to bounce it all to come back to Eugene and start over.

Whether its fortunate or unfortunate, I'm not motivated by money, I'd rather be happy. I've always thought though, that if someone wasn't interested in me because I wasn't interested in money, then so be it. I do get needing financial stability, don't get me wrong, I'm just walking a much thinner line than some folks are comfortable with.

Depression - When are you kidding yourself?

So, I was thinking today...no really, I was.

When a person is depressed, or feeling down, they are encouraged to 'perk up' or 'look on the bright side' and to stay positive. How does this really help but on the surface? It seems to me that a person might be just fooling themselves if they don't deal with their feelings.

I've been wondering if I'm depressed lately, and I'm not sure if I can really tell. I've had some things go on recently that brought me down, but they seem mostly superficial or small (bad basketball games, stupid things at work, believe it or not, the Ducks losing has affected me pretty big too).

I do know that I'm feeling behind the eight ball so to speak on what I considered my goals since I moved back to Eugene. I'm not volunteering like I wanted to, I'm not exercising like I want to be (I have lost 13lbs or so, which is good, and I feel healthy), and I don't have the job I want yet, but I'm not sure thats enough to bring me down. I've had a really positive attitude since I moved down, but also when I was up in Beaverton I learned how to stay positive through stress and adversity.

I've been really tired lately too, even though I've been sleeping well at night, and its harder to be more positive when you're so tired. Speaking of tired, I think I better get to sleep...lol. I'll think more about this tomorrow, and the next day, and the next day...

Usually these feelings come and go in waves, so I guess I'll keep trying to figure it out, and maybe it will pass on again (besides, I have a TOOL concert to go to next week, so I should be psyched!!!)..

Laters!!

Weirdness...

So, I had this dream last night. I don't remember it all, pretty much just the theme and the person who was in it. Strange stuff.

Now, I have dreams about women and relationships as often as I have other dreams (you know, being a superhero, basketball star, and not so recently....the dreams that wake me up in the middle of the night terrified for no real reason, haven't had one of those since I moved back to Eugene). Normally the dreams are just generic good feelings about being in some sort of long term relationship, being happy, and I can usually tell if its someone I know, or just some mystery person.

This one was pretty specific with regards to the person and the fact that it was a serious, long term thing. Granted, she was exactly as I remember her when I dated her about 10 years ago, but how else would I remember her?

Normally I forget my dreams right after I wake up, but not today. I've been thinking about her all day, I can't tell you how intense the feeling is (not since I was actually last dating someone did I feel these types of emotions, and thats been quite a while). I haven't spoken to her since I was probably 25, maybe longer. She's definitely one of the women I dated that was a good one that 'got away'.

I've been totally preoccupied all day, and its driving me nuts. So nuts that I went online to search her out and see if I could find her. Of all places to find her, I'm pretty sure I found her on Myspace. She wasn't listed under her name, of course, but I read her profile up and down and am pretty sure its her. So, I sent her a message to be sure.

What do I expect to come from it? I'm not entirely sure, she appears to be in a relationship, which is ok. She appears to be pretty happy too, and thats good. I think I'll just settle down a bit and just get reacquainted with her, and go from there.

I do tend to go back and analyze things all the time, including past relationships, and I'm sure this is just a product of that, but it was still a pretty strange way to start and spend the day, and again it was odd that my feelings were so specific.

I've known for a little while now that I'm ok with the idea of a relationship, which is new. When I was in Beaverton it was difficult to even think about a relationship, but now I'm ok with it. I guess I could look at this as sort of a wake up call. Maybe I could actually function in a relationship, that would be an interesting proposition...

Ahh...updating the blog.

So, it looks like I haven't been on my blog now for quite some time, since September...what a lazy ass!

Well, its partially due to being wrapped up in work, part football, and part due to lack of internet access.

Ok, so I can get over the work thing, though I have been working 45 hours or so a week (a paltry number compared to my life in Beaverton, so I should be able to manage). Football, well, I don't just watch football on the weekends. I have been spending time sorting my belongings, trying to figure out exactly how I want to furnish and 'decorate' my one big room. The apartment is not a bad size really, and once I'm at least half-way done with furnishing it, I think it will look great.

Have I said that I love it? Its in a great location, I have a regular person as a landlord (not a big rental company), and my neighbors don't seem to be too bad at this point.

Lets get to the Internet access, this is a funny one. When I moved in someone had intermittent wireless that was unsecured, and now its been unsecured for quite a while. So I've been borrowing it. Shame on me? Maybe, but shame on them for not securing it! For what its worth, do plan on compensating the owner for it when I can, and if I figure out who it is.

So how are things going? Well, I think they're fine. I'm trying to get an handle on the financial thing. Its funny how much money I had when I was unemployed. My money is funny now, but I'm hoping to find a job to improve that in the new year.

I'm really trying to avoid getting in a rut, I was in a serious rut most of my time in Beaverton, and even when I was back down here before I moved up to Beaverton. How do you have a routine, and not let it get into a rut? I'm working on that now. Routine without rut...an interesting concept.

I've got a pretty good routine going, the benefits? I sleep now, I don't have nearly as much of a problem with my stomach like I had in the past, my dishes are always done and I cook nearly every day (I cook simply, but I do cook). I make a lunch for work the next day every night. Oh yes, I've dropped nearly 13 pounds since I started working mid September)! Generally I feel very good about how things are going, I guess I could say..

I'd like to see people more, but sometimes when I feel like I have to conserve fuel (the weather isn't real great for riding a bike at this point) and money, I don't tend to do a whole lot. I think once I get a handle on the budget, this will change.

My focus now is finding a job that will make my life a little easier budget-wise, figure out a way to get back in school, and also find a way to see all the people that I want to see.

Ok, I suppose this ramble has gone on long enough, so I'll bail. I was reading the paper at work today, and rather than watch the Ducks game on tv tomorrow night, I think I'm going to go see a percussion show. My old drum teacher from high school and college is now teaching at a local high school, and they have been invited to a prestigious percussion show up in Seattle. They're putting on a free performance tomorrow night and if I know Alan, these kids will kick ass!

Later!

got 98% of my stuff moved in!

Its not a great big place, but I'm totally stoked to finally have my own place!

The Apartment Odyssy....at an end?

It appears that my search for an apartment may be at an end! I signed lease papers on Friday for a super small studio apartment in downtown Eugene. The bad news? Well, the apartment I signed the lease for has some 'charms' the first of which is that the bathroom and the kitchen share a sink. Neato huh? One other charm that I know of is that the house (one house, 4 studio apartments) shares a water heater...lovely huh? I don't have to pay the water bill, or the electricity that heats the water though, so thats cool.

Ok, time to go get my keys!

I did get some good news this morning though, rather than the small studio upstairs, I get the bigger studio downstairs! Booya!

I'll update again once I get done moving in!

The point of my return....

So, I moved back to Eugene after living and working in Beaverton for the last 3 years.

I lived in Eugene for 23 years or so before moving, and I had a great time in Portland. I had tons of great experiences, advanced my career at Stream International, and made WAY more friends than I ever thought I would. There was still something missing.

I started thinking about moving back to Eugene in February (I'd always thought about it since I moved to Beaverton, but it became a real focus for me in Feb.). I spent more and more time going over why I would leave, why I would stay. What would the impact be to me? To my friends? To my co-workers and the clients we supported? What about the impact to my family since I'd moved to Portland? How would it be coming back? They all still live in Eugene. I visited Eugene sometimes 3-4 times a month, but most times it was once every three weeks, the drive became pretty short...lol. In the end, I could see myself living in Eugene in 10 years more than I could see myself living in Portland, and I missed my family far to much to stay.

**I'm going to begin including links in the next paragraphs that should open up in their own windows, but I'm not posting the links tonight, I'll update the blog later, I need to upload the pictures to a new photo-album that is easier to navigate than my WebShots account. Stay Tuned for the photos**

In the end I decided to leave my job (still don't have a new job in Eugene yet, sorta like jumping out of a plane without a parachute) , move out of my apartment (again, the parachute analogy), and just get my ass down to Eugene.

Some of the things most people would consider most important, I don't have: A place to live thats actually mine, and a way to earn income.

I do have the most important things to me though, and they are the reason I moved. I'll just jump right to it, the reason I'm writing this blog. Its the people I needed, the family. Here is what I've done since I moved back:

Since I didn't have a job, and was living rent free, I first went down to San Fransisco to see **Karl and Janine's first child, Cassandra Jane. She is ADORABLE, and I had a GREAT trip!

I've driven around town a ton, seeing all the old places, and how much EVERYTHING has changed, its madness, but still has that comfortable old feeling.

I've hiked **Spencer's Butte twice, once with Anastasia and Zane, once with **Chris H.

I went to the Saturday Market with Anastasia and Zane

I had beers with my **two brothers, whom I hadn't seen in years probably, more on them in a future blog. My sister Sabrina was there too, and I'm thankful to her for getting us together.

I went fishing at Leaburg Dam with my brothers a few miles up the McKenzie river east of Springfield, which it was nice to see again. Always an adventure with my brothers....lol

I've spent time with my mom, who I hardly saw the whole time I was in Portland. Its always interesting spending time with her and her new husband Randy (more on that story later..)

I went to my niece's birthday party (Tim's daughter) a party which we celebrated my nephew Tyas' birthday as well. It was really good to see them all again, and I had a good time!

I went to the **beach with Todd, Anastasia and Zane, which was a blast!

I hung out with Will and Kim at our friends new restaraunt, good times. I hadn't seen them in quite a while!

My fatigue is getting to me, so I'm going to cut the blog short for now, I'll add more later. I don't have internet access at my trailer at this point(yes, seriously more on that later...LOL!)

Whats next? I'm going to put down some goals I have upon my return to Eugene, I think the future is bright here, and I'm looking forward to it!

Fowl Predictions - Psuedo Sportcenter host, ME!

This pic was taken when I visited ESPN Headquarters in Bristol CT in April of 05. Totally ROCKS!

Update 9-22-07: Ducks vs Stanford. I see the Ducks winning this one big. They may give up a big play or three, but Stanford doesn't have the offense to score against a Ducks 'D' that is playing very well at this point. Ducks continue putting up big numbers, winning 45-17 down on the farm. Jonathan Stewart goes for 150 and 1 score (still waiting for him to break one of those punt/kickoff returns for a TD, does it happen today?), while Dennis Dixon rushes and passes his way for another big day (400 total, 110 on the ground and 290 in the air). The running game gets more spread out with the new faces putting up some yards in the second half (Johnson still getting nearly 100 yards on his own).

9-15-07: Addendum to the 9-11-07 update. I have a sneaking suspicion that Oregon may open up a can of whoopass today. Just a comment....

UPDATE 9-11-07: Yep, I missed the prediction on the Michigan game, but I wouldn't have called it the way it happened. I was thinking it was going to be a close game, with Michigan on the winning end. I'm not a Duck doubter or anything, but who could see the Wolverines dropping two in a row to start a season? I also didn't see Dennis Dixon with 300+ overall yards, WHOA!

Next prediction is for Fresno State at Autzen. Don't know much about Fresno State this year, but I'm seeing another close game with the Bulldogs. I do see some offense in this game, so here it goes:

Ducks win a squeaker, 42-38. Dixon continues to tear up the defense, but Stewart finally gets going too (to the tune of 2TD's and 100+ yards on the ground). Defense will likely run an interception back for a TD also, that would be great to see (goosebumps here, I'm hearing "Kenny Wheaton is gonna score, Kenny Wheaton is gonna score!!"). Jeremiah Johnson will have 1TD and over 100 yards on the ground as well. It'll be a great game!

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UPDATE 9-3-07: Final Score: 48-27. Not bad for my first prediction! Now I just have to work on the details, I wasn't even close on the stats for the game, who knew Dennis Dixon was going to go for 141 yards, geesh!

Oregon vs Houston - Oregon wins an offensive game, 45-28. Jonathan Stewart goes for 150 and 3 TD's, Oregon returns a punt for a TD.

This is me setting up my mobile go blogger.com!

Now I am able to send photos from my phone to this blog site directly! I can be on vacation, on a hike, at the mall (cause yeah...I do that...;), or anywhere, and send the message directly here!

How cool is that!

Sometimes its the smell.....

The funny thing about being sensitive to smell, is that it works both ways.

While I will gag at the smell of some things (nothing comes to mind right away, but the smells are there!), when the smells are nice I have a hard time thinking there is anything better.

Example:

I just went for a walk with my niece and nephew down by the Willamette river (about 10 minutes from the house) and it reminded me so much of when I was in 5th grade, that it took me way back. It probably helps that my niece just turned 10, and is nearly the same age I was when I was going down by the river.

Of course I was doing things that my mother would never have approved of, and I was coming from a much greater distance than we just walked, but I digress.....

The sights, the smells, and the sounds were all the same. It was a very nice walk, and its SO good to be home again.

G~